Being the Chosen one comes with some responsibility.

You have been chosen because your friend knows that you are a good friend and they trust you.

It is important to support your friend through what they are going through
BUT
you must also look after yourself and make sure that you are safe too.

Remember, you don’t have to fix the situation. Just be there, listen and support.

What can I do?

Keep Listening. Be a friend. Be supportive and encouraging and just keep being yourself!!!
BUT
if you start to feel overwhelmed by it all make sure you...

*get help and any support that you might need.
*talk to an adult and get advice for yourself if the situation is serious and you are concerned for your friend. This could be a parent, a teacher, the school counsellor or any adult that you trust and feel comfortable talking to.
*share your own feelings with someone you trust if it gets too much for you.

What can I encourage my friend to do?

*Encourage your friend to keep talking. It’s the best thing they can do.
*Encourage your friend to write down their thoughts and feelings. It’s good to get it all out on paper.
*Keep a “positive” journal. Together you can find and record the good things that happen throughout the day. This can also provide you with things to talk about and reflect on together and it is all positive.
*Get out and do stuff with your friend. Don’t let them hide away and withdraw from life. Ask, “when can we go…” questions rather than “do you want to…” questions.

Make a plan

Making a plan with your friend is a really good idea.

Your plan can include how and when your friend wants to be helped.

*Decide how to communicate with each other;
-a text, DM, Messenger…
-a phone call
-a video chat
-meeting up somewhere
-hanging out

*Decide when. Set a time or times that you will check in or meet up during the day. Having a set time is a really good way for both of you to know when you will be free to communicate or meet up.

*Agree on the names of other people/adults that your friend is comfortable telling if and when they may be needed.


What can I say or do to cheer my Friend up?

Your friend has chosen you because you are already a good friend. Just keep on doing the things that you have always done and be the person you have always been.

Here are some suggestions/ideas to help you.
*Hey, do you remember when we…(funny memory)
*Do you want to go hang out together?
*Do you want to go see a movie?
*Do you want to play video games?
*Let’s go - play rugby/cricket/touch/fishing etc.
*Come on, let’s go for a walk/run/bike ride.
*Let’s take some crazy selfies.
*Whose got the worst joke? J
*Help me plan my birthday party.


When helping a friend

*Do not try to give advice.
*Do not interrupt them when they are talking.
*Do not talk about yourself.
*Do not say that you’ve had something similar happen to you unless you actually really truly have.
*Do not change the topic.
*Do not brush them off.
*Do not say that you know how they feel.
*Do not go and tell all your friends.
*Do not laugh at what they are saying.
*Do not tell them that you don’t believe them.
*Do not tell them that they just need to get over it.